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    Tuesday, October 25, 2005

    Need Your Help with....I Love You, But I'm Not In Love With You

    I feel like I need to address an issue that was brought up in my "Few Things About Me" post. I stated that my husband is in love with me, but I'm not sure I am in love with him.

    You will have an abundance of people in your life that you love and many that love you back. I have this strange belief that maybe we weren't meant to stay with one person for the rest of our lives. I think that you should love the person you are with and if it doesn't work out, so what, who's next?

    If God had meant for us to love only one person, why did he give us those feelings of new love and let them fade with time. Is this a test?

    Sometimes (ok, all the time) I miss the tingling feeling you get when you are newly in love. Your whole body is bustling with nervous and happy feelings. These are replaced by boredom and complacency. How can you get these sparks back?

    My questions to you are : Do you think we are meant to be with one person forever? How can you get the spark back? I'd love to hear from you!


    factory_peasant said...

    i think finding a person to spend your life with happily married is damn near impossible to achieve. to be sure, it can be done but it seems that's the exception not the rule. i mean it's rare isn't it?

    myself, i've never been married. so i'm not speaking from experience about the deal. after the last few relationships i had i'm not sure it's worth trying for anymore.

    tami said...

    Well, dear, I dunno... I'm the world's worst to ask. Maybe 'cuz I've been married 4 (f-o-u-r) times, but I'll throw this in for you, as it's something that I've learned over the years.

    The spark, the butterflies, the excitement will fade, yes. It took me a long time to realize that the quest for newness in a relationship DOES go away in time... and that's normal. I am in awe of you, girlfriend - you've been married longer than ALL of my marriages put together. You love him, yes? You respect him, yes? He loves you? He respects you?

    Most importantly... are you both friends?

    I'll shut up now... again, I'm one to talk, lol.

    DZER said...

    I dunno ... no woman's ever been able to stand me for long enough for any spark to fade LOL

    SignGurl said...

    peasant- sounds like we think alike

    tami- F O U R times? y
    You do like to keep it new. You go girl. You have your points with the love, respect and friendship. It just feels like we are roommates.

    Dzer- you have all of us on-line sluts who put up with you. We are all fighting each other for ya!

    ***Double_Oh_No*** said...

    I'm trying to find the answer to this same question right now, myself.