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    Friday, November 18, 2005

    Duh!

    I have a problem. It's not something everyone has to deal with. It's really a stupid problem. My problem you ask? I can't freaking keep my eyes open with flash photography. WTF!

    In order to even remotely have my eyes slightly open in pictures I have to open my eyes really wide, try to give that million dollar smile (k, not really a million, just a couple of thousand) which in turn makes my nostrils flare like a freaking dragon. So yeah, I always looked stoned in every picture.

    Case in point:


    I have had photo sensitivity since I was a kid but it seems to be much worse! Somebody help me here. Is there hope for me? Will I ever look normal (ok, not normal, but at least human) again in a picture?

    The photographer for our wedding told me that blinking during a flash was a sign of intelligence. Fucker lied to me! You can't tell me I'm smart because I blink, damnit!

    And looking at this picture reminds me that I have one eye smaller than the other and my upper lip disappears when I smile. Good God, I need help. This is the legacy I have to leave my children. Pictures of their mother with closed eyes or retarded (don't give me grief about saying they are retarded. I've never been very politically correct and I'm not starting now) eyes. Nice, really freaking nice.

    13 comments:

    SignGurl said...

    I thought this was funny but I might regret it in the morning!

    DZER said...

    well, at least you're not a deer in the headlights kind of person LOL

    but you have AMAZING eyes ... great color!

    *wink*

    da buttah said...

    sexy!!

    if it makes you feel any better..i have asian syndrom....ahh yes, when i smile for photo's my eyes become nothing more than little slits in my head.

    not fun.

    not good for photo's.

    thus i am well versed in the fake-a-smile-and-open-eyes-wide look.

    also..look above the camera, helps keep your eyes from the direct shine of the flash :)

    Quazirob said...

    We are all our own worst critic. Looks good from where i'm sitting.

    gigi said...

    Shut Up!
    You are soo pretty!
    And you have big tits.
    So...Shut up!
    Luv ya!

    MamaKBear said...

    I think it looks fine! :)
    Do you know how many pics I took before I finally got a decent shot of my eyes for HNT this week?!? Sheesh.

    And I, too, suffer from Asian syndrome when I smile...my eyes just disappear!

    Anyway, I think you're beautiful!

    ~Deb said...

    Well may I compliment you on those baby blues you have! Hmmmm, never blinked during the flash shots---that's why I'm dumber than a box of rocks....

    Ummmmmmmm....how does Gigi know you have big tits??????????????

    *haha*

    gigi said...

    I am a tit expert!

    Scott & Julia said...

    I have no advice for you, because I always show up with my eyes closed. My graduation pics were quite funny! And that's a very HOT shot you posted for HNT! Happy belated HNT!

    Chrissie said...

    LOL... Just reeelaax

    This pic here is beautiful? I think tis a cute nose.. doesnt look flairy..? But then maybe i dont knwo what it looks like un flaired? lol Either way its better than my honker!
    Your skin is perfect...
    smile.. nice! teeth perfectly stright!
    and your eyes... we could go on and on about those for days... damn i wish i had blue eyes!... yours are a beautiful shade!

    Chrissie said...

    btw... i have heard (seen) you refer to yourself as fat MANY times... this is NOT the face of a fat girl!
    I think you may have one of those funhouse mirrors in yer bathroom!
    I think your wrong!

    tami said...

    I'm so jealous of your blue eyes - both of 'em.

    And don't fret that your eyes "don't match"... nobody has matching eyes, except Heidi Klum. And we ALL know that she's not human!

    You're gorgeous, babe. Deal with it.

    barman said...

    A couple of observations and comments if you do not mind. First I think that picture of you looks fine. I think you are being to critical. You landed the hubby, right! Oh and might I add what a smile. I am so jealous.

    Now for the real reason I wanted to post this message. I saw you mention your blue eyes somewhere. I believe you said you had a back-handed comment about them. Your eyes are awesone. I thought so when I first saw this message but decided not to comment. I just had to return.

    I love blue eyes like yours. It looks like you can see all the way to your soul. It is because of people eyes just like yours that I started to pay closer attention to peoples eyes to begin with. I pay attention to eyes even over some other popular things people pay attention to.

    If I should ever bump into you and happen to have my camera with me (something I never do so don't worry) you gotta let me take your picture. Just a nice head shot will do fine. Oh and I can take tons of pictures so I am sure we can manage to get one without you blinking. I think indirect lighting would do nicely.

    I hope that hot water heater is pumping out the good life once again. A nice hot bath seems in order and then ... on to the holidays!