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    Friday, March 03, 2006

    Office Politics

    I worked for a top 5 life insurance company in the underwriting department for 5 years. It was fun except that I had to supervise eight women. That's never fun. Especially when we all started to cycle together. Good times! It didn't help that we didn't have offices per say. We had those stupid little cubicles with the half walls. My boss was an ignorant man. He would stand on the other side of my half wall and pick his nose. I don't mean inconspicuously, I mean like he was bordering on touching his brain. He would pull out his finger and proceed to check out what treasures his finger bestowed. I would have to try to hold a conversation while watching this and secretly wretching. Whenever I had to handle any files that he had touched I would immediatly wash, no scrub, my hands. I don't deal well with my own boogers, let alone booger boy's.

    Now that I work with my stepdad, I spend a lot of time alone at work. I do miss the days of me entertaining people. I was well known throghout the building for using gummy bears to recreate the Kama Sutra and having my boss catch me. God, I miss being funny. I don't miss my panty hose problems. The crotch was either hanging to my knees or I had baggy ankles. Dead sexy! I was good for a laugh.

    Anywho, I don't get to deal much with people in person and when I do it's almost always men. Normally this would be a good thing. Today was a different story. My stepdad takes me to lunch every day. It's usually nothing fancy. We usually have the soup and salad bar at the local bar. Today we decided to go to the local sandwich shop. This is not like a Subway. It's a real dive and I have yet to see any woman besides myself eat there. I found out today why. The owner is a member of Alcoholics Anonymous with my stepdad and it seems that most of the group hangs out there all day drinking coffee. Today I was bombarded with ten horny old men talking about how at the bakery they get the girls wearing short skirts to reach up onto the high shelves. They even went so far as to go into detail about the length and color of her attire. I felt invisible and wished I was. I mean if they weren't all over 60, it might have been hot. I felt all dirty like I needed a shower after lunch.

    Edit~ I'm playing learning HTML for dummies. Can you tell?


    Madame X said...

    Holy Hell SG!

    My mom used to work at a bakery and used to tell me the same thing!

    buddha_girl said...

    E-FUCKING-GADS! My sympathies!

    Boogers? I HATE boogers. I once knew some fucker who would pick his nose and flick his boogs on the floor. Made me gag...just seeing him...even when he wasn't picking and flicking.

    Panyhose? Hell, I don't own a pair these days! Now THAT is good times!!!!

    Sal said...

    Damn good post. You are funny.

    P.S. I'm under 60. *wink*

    SignGurl said...

    Madame~Your mom sounds hot.

    Buddha Girl~If I see boogers I start wretching and gagging. I guess the same thing happens when I wear pantyhose, lol.

    Sal~What are you doing here so late?

    Note to self~Next time don't drink alone.

    DZER said...

    there's no dirty man like an old dirty man ... heh

    Budding Rose said...

    Such a great tale.
    Dirty old men are sort of fun.
    When I start a new job, all the women sync up to my cycle. Guess that means I'm the alpha bitch.

    Wenchy said...

    Ahhhhhhhhhhh I'm learning photoshop except I'm da dummie!!! LOL

    Suze said...

    Jenn, I have to ask did your boss eat or flick his boogers?

    As for the dirty old men and the bakery assistants. I would have to go in to work wearing a pair of panties saying "Go Fuck Yourself" on the back. LOL.

    terry said...

    dirty old men... grody!
    and i LOVE suze's idea!

    Nonny said...

    You get to be funny for us. We appreciate your humor :)

    You seem to really be grasping the html.

    Big Pissy said...

    That is SOOOOOO grosssssss!!!!

    But I love the gummie bear kama sutra!

    After you learn html, will you teach me? ;-)

    Top cat said...

    Jenn, could you reach up to the top shelf so I could look at that sign?...heh heh heh(grinz)


    American Navel said...

    gross! boogers and dirty old men!