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    Tuesday, March 14, 2006

    Stale Nuts and Blowing Balls

    Have you ever had one of those days where you just giggle all day? Come on. Fess up.

    Today was one of those for me. T (my stepdad who is also my boss) eats peanuts all day long. He's a little guy who flies around like a hummingbird so I guess he needs extra nourishment. Today when I came into work, the bag of peanuts was open. I burst out laughing and told him that he had stale nuts. (Insert nervous giggle along with outright guffawing). A little later (a minute) he decided to see how stale his nuts were. As we are working across from each other at the work bench I could smell his breath. It was all I could do to stop myself from saying, "I can smell your stale nuts from here". Again, I'm giggling and there is no way I'm letting him know why.

    The nut story reminds me of another one. My friend and I were shopping just before Christmas in the mall. There was a cart in the center with a man selling flavored nuts. You know the ones that smell so delicious? So my friend decides that she has to go get some. I told her she should ask the vendor if she can smell his nuts first before she buys them. This lady standing next to us in the aisle rolled her eyes at me and walked away. I, of course, could not breathe because I was laughing so hard.

    I have a really cute jacket that has pom poms on the ends of the strings for the hood. The funny thing about them is that the balls hit me right at the end of my nipples. So now I have balls on my nipples. It's been very windy the past several days. As I was walking up to the school to pick up my daughter, the wind blew the pom poms back. I again burst out in a fit of giggles and was still laughing when I entered the office. The secretary asked me what was so funny and I told her that it was so windy that it blew my balls back. The entire office exploded with laughter and I don't think much more work got done today.

    16 comments:

    Danny said...

    stale nuts.....

    anyway, later dahling.

    Big Pissy said...

    hee hee! I get like that sometimes too!

    I love to laugh! =)

    Sal said...

    Thanks for making me giggle.

    Sparkle said...

    I blow balls all the time!

    Madame X said...

    LMAO!!!!

    I enjoy the "Wet Nuts" walnuts in syrup that you put on sundaes...
    Well I work the "wet Nuts" baby!!

    DZER said...

    are all ball references funny? LOL

    and nuts?

    hmm ... you better not go shopping in the pastry aisle for ding dongs! LOL

    Suze said...

    Jenn, what colour do you think Dzer's are today? LOL.

    MamaKBear said...

    LMAO! So you've basically had your head in the gutter all day, haven't ya? MuAH HAHAHAHA!

    crabcake said...

    LOL! I'm having one of those days now thanks to you.

    PS. Doing hook ups at the Cowpie field for single folks. snicker snicker.....

    ~Deb said...

    Oh…my….LAWD! I was in tears reading this! You are too funny my dear! You know, at my old place of work, I was being trained by this girl…and the boss comes up to us and says, “You know, she taught the other girl before you—she’s the best at teaching.” Then he continues…”Taught. Taught. What a funny word….Taught taught taught taught taught…twat.” Say “taught” ten times real fast and you WILL say that last word I inserted.

    We were SO embarrassed to laugh---but we ended up laughing so hard that we had to all leave the room.

    Those kind of giggles are uncontrollable and SO much fun! Just by your laugh on that audio blog of yours made me laugh. You seem like a fun person to hang out with! If you’re even in NY----let me know!

    ~Deb said...

    And yeah, I was never into nuts...








    (Well...you know why.) ;)

    SignGurl said...

    Dannyt~I know for a fact that your nuts are stale. Baster told me.

    Pissy~Let's hang out and giggle together.

    Sal~You giggling is just so hot!

    Sparkle~Somehow I don't doubt that.

    Madame~Ewww...wet nuts. Wanna smell my nuts?

    DZER~Somehow Ding Dongs aren't as funny as nuts. They are a little hard to smell through the wrapper.

    Suze~I hope they aren't black and blue!

    Deb~Twat, bwhahahah! Why don't you like to smell nuts again? Bwahahahaha!

    SignGurl said...

    MamaK~Oops, I missed you. It's not just my head in the gutter, haha!

    CrabCake~Aren't those days sooo funny?

    Big Cute Lady said...

    Okay, I was at our new arena for a concert a few years back. The seats are on top of each other. And don't dare be fat, cause you'll spill over into the seats on either side of you, causing the person sitting beside you to be forced to put their are around you and your knees are about 1.5 inches from the bitches head in front of you. So I'm sitting there, eating nuts. You know the ones you have to crack open. I'm a happy fat girl. Till the lights came up, let's just say that the bitch in front of me had a considerable amount of nut dust in her long, beautiful, curly hair. My friend and I laughed till we peed....

    Jodes said...

    yep, I sure have!!! :)

    SignGurl said...

    Cute Lady~I can just hear you laughing. That poor woman didn't know what hit her.

    Jodes~I think we all need more.