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    Monday, February 04, 2008

    Small Minded, Huge Idiots

    I have major issues with varicose veins in my legs. I shouldn't say major because they don't really hurt, they are just ugly. I've had them since I was 18 years old and stood on my feet in 4" high heels working retail.

    The veins are much more noticeable now that I've lost weight. Maybe they are just more noticeable to me.

    Anyway, I went to a Women's Expo this past weekend and there was a clinic that does vein work. I started talking to someone working at the booth. I explained that I was interested having mine removed but that I wanted to wait until I finished losing weight. She asked how much I had lost. I forget how flabbergasting the idea is to someone else when they learn that you've lost close to 200 pounds. Of course, her first question was how I had lost all that weight. I always pause when this question is posed because I'm not really sure I want to open that door. You know, the weight loss surgery door.

    In the midst of all of this, this other woman who was working the booth came over and interrupted our conversation. I have to describe this person. She had glasses on from the 80's that resembled owl glasses. Her wrinkled white shirt was tucked in crooked into her pants that were pulled up to just below her bra. Her greasy hair was sloppily pulled back into a messy pony tail. She appeared to be about 40ish and was at least 60 pounds overweight. She was a mess.

    In the middle of the first lady's and my conversation, she butted in and said, "You had weight loss surgery, didn't you?" I explained that I had indeed. She proceeded to tell me that I was going to die a slow horrible death based on the fact that my body had been "disturbed". She informed me that she knew this because she was, in fact, a doctor (I've never seen a doctor that was dressed like she was, but her name tag did state that she was indeed a doctor). She asked if I had side effects from having had the surgery. I told her that I didn't. She yelled, "Well, you are one of the lucky few!"

    I tried to compose myself from going all ape shit on this poorly kept woman. I really did take a deep breath and I counted to 5 (I never make it to 10). I explained that I speak daily to several people who have had the surgery and none of them have issues regarding their health. Most people who do have issues are able to overcome them through diet and making sure they get the vitamins they need daily.

    I let her know that I had gained my life back since I was now free to move around this Earth without the stigma of Extreme Morbid Obesity. My children had their mother back and my husband has a wife again.

    I know that many average joes have no knowledge of this surgery. I expect that someone who has gone to medical school would at least have their facts straight, but that is where I've gone wrong. My own doctor had very few ideas about this surgery except for negative ones that he couldn't back up with data. He has now come around and uses Mr. Sign (mostly, because he hates me, but that's another story) and myself as his star patients.

    I feel like I'm fighting fires all the time regarding my decision to have this surgery. In the end, it's all been worth it.


    lime said...

    gees, you know it often astonishes me the stupidity i find among people who really should know better. i am sorry you are encountering this from doctors of all people, including your own. i'd be inclined to look for a new one. and that one at the booth seems highly unprofessional. she doesn't know your health history how can she even begin to offer a prognosis or comment knowledgably?

    G-Man said...

    You shoulda Bitch Slapped her!!!

    Kittie Kate said...

    There are always people who don't know how to mind their own business. No matter what you talk about, there are those people and they think they know everything too.

    What the Chuck said...

    Hi SG,

    Don't sweat it. You're the one living the benefits. Who the hell cares what someone else thinks?



    Sicilian said...

    What an idiot. . . a complete utterly stupid unkempt biatch. . . . YOu keep you chin up. . . and you know you are bettter for your decision. . . don't let stupid people derail your progress.

    barman said...

    I can not believe that they had THIS person at the fair to represent anyone. She has no business working with people with so unprofessional of an attitude about her. You know, I am glad you counted to 5. Basically, as far as I am concerned, you came off looking good, she did not. It is just a shame that people of the medical field can be so uninformed and opinionated.

    If you asked me, even if you disrupted your body, I would have to think the benefits to your health almost cutting your weight in half have to far out shine that. What a total fool. I think you needed to fill out a feedback card somewhere on how unprofessional this person is.

    You know, maybe G-Man had a point.

    wisdomstuff said...

    There is someone around every corner to tell you that you've done something wrong. As long as you are happy with your decision that is all that matters.

    cadbury_vw said...

    even if she was right - which would have killed you first? the surgery or the weight?

    as for her comments, they are utter bullshit. good for you for tuning her in. what an unprofessional event. no respect for privacy issues there by commenting that loudly.

    did her name tag say Dr. or M.D.?

    there are various natural medicine homeopathy type of outfits that use the term doctor up here (and chiropractors) that are not MDs

    Strumpet said...

    'Bitch,' indeed, Sign-babe.

    You weren't talking to her in the first fucking place.

    Did you ASK for her opinion? NO!

    People like that need to focus on their own shit, instead of worrying about everyone else's.

    Doctorate, or not.... she's a fucktard.

    We are all only individuals in this great big world. We are blessed in our lifetime to have so many different options available to us as human beings dealing with all the issues in the world that we have to deal with.

    Granted, what works for one may not work for another, but that has NOTHING to do with the fact that she was trying to instill fear in someone else so that maybe she didn't have to focus so much on her own personal issues....like something pretty basic as fucking physical hygiene.


    Regardless of her ignorance on how to be a nice person....YOU were able to shine through as your Sign-licious self and keep your cool and not let the blind man get you down.

    You are happy and wonderful and awesome.

    And that's all there is to it.


    t_cole said...

    there will always be stupid people.
    sorry you had to run into one of them...
    You know I am in the process of getting approval from my insurance comp for gastric bypass. And I anticipate the nay-sayers.
    And for me, personally, I am going to tell them to go piss up a rope...

    Manny said...

    Sign, Sign, Sig, relax...let me kick off in her behind for you.

    Jenn you are so loving and kind. Some people just down right suck. Don't let the sucky ones spend time inside your head. And don't let them hurt your heart either. Don't waste your precious time on them honey.


    Jon said...

    If you have a friend that is a nurse you can hear all kinds stories about how fucked up doctors are. Don't even think about that bitch again. You made a difficult, brave, and healthy decision. It was yours to make. OMG I am so pissed after reading that.


    terry said...

    you needn't explain yourself to anyone...especially not idiots like this.

    next time, just smile and shrug. that kind of thing really irks jackasses.

    Tomscockwhore said...

    I agree with g-man - you should've bitch slapped her. People are ignorant sometimes. Weight loss surgery, cosmetic surgery, next thing you know they will be criticizing lasik!

    Lori said...

    Holy cow what an idiot. Gotta love those know it alls who actually know nothing...oh wait, NOT!

    HUGS Jenn...you have so much loving support here from so many 'fans'...THAT is what you hold on to and you let shit like that lady roll right off of your thinning gorgeous back.

    Anonymous said...

    i woulda bitch slapped her myself, but that's just me. :)or i woulda stuck my finger in her face and told her "you mess wit da bull ya get da horns, capeesh!!" hha!

    seriously, what an a-hole that woman was to you!! why the hell did she feel the need to throw her 2 sense in anyways?

    sounds like you handled yourself like a real champ, girl. :)

    Yippeeskip said...

    I was watching the Today show about People's magazine spread of people who have lost a shit load of weight and the editor of the magazine said that these people did it the "hard" way through diet and excercise. She was very negative about the surgery. What was not mentioned is that in all ads for weight loss programs anything over 50lbs loss is not typical results. We need WLS as an option as an intervention-not the solution to obesity. WLS is not the easier way out contrary to popular belief. We still must do the work.
    Good for you Jenn for educating an ignoramus on the realities of WLS

    Evening said...

    What the heck is wrong with people? First of all, what made her think you wanted her opinion? She was rude and even mean. Does she think that there are no side affects to living with the weight you had before the surgery?
    I know this must be frustrating for youto feel you need to defend your decision but you are letting people that are clueless to how it can change your life for the better be better educated about this life changing procedure.
    I think people have an attitude about any type of plastic surgery. They think it is cosmetic and vanity. And even if it is, so what. But there are self esteem issues associated with all these types of things that are important for peoples well being.
    After my mastectomy, I actually had someone tell me I shouldn't have had implants but in as part of my reconstruction. They acted like I should be grateful just to have my life. I was but, I was irrate that they thought I should have to live with the way I was left after losing my breasts because it was vainity to "replace" them.
    But you know what SignGurl, Most people are nice and probably very happy that your life is better. I am.

    Pam said...

    Dang girl! You're WAY nicer than I am. I would have kicked her in the knee and told her to mind her own business and go take a shower.

    Actually when I get comments like these, I normally just come back with "WLS has changed a lot in the past few years, you might want to do some additional research on the topic before you pass judgement."

    Good job on handling it in an adult manner. Too bad she didn't.

    jillie said...

    I would have said "well, coming from a person who can't even bathe, I don't think your advise is even worth listening to. So tell me, where do you practice so I know NOT to go to your office"

    What a effin beoch!!!

    There are schmucks everywhere. And the worst part is, the second they open their mouths, the look even dumber ;o)

    You keep doing what you're doing there Jenn!


    jillie said...

    I hear you're "thigh high" in snow....yikes! You should come out to California! No snow here...well, not in Ocean Beach anyway ;o)

    Zoely said...

    fer feck's sake. the more i hear about people, the more I am glad that i define myself as not being self-righteous; non-judgemental; ignorant (because i am, about many things, and when i am? i keep my mouth shut til i learn a little bit) and also? a misanthropist.
    What, exactly, did this "doctor" expect you to do with her information? Undo the surgery? again i say, ffs.

    *S* said...

    What an utter waste of time! You were very patient to try and educate her - she sounds like a hopeless cause, though.

    I'm more worried about your PCP. If he doesn't get with the program and stop hating you, you need to give that shitstain his walking papers. Life is too short not to go through it with decent, empathetic health care.

    Stay warm!


    RONJAZZ said...

    Ditto with everyone here. Your decision to lose the weight and the consideration you gave it all is remarkable. People like that, well...That's why there is gun control!...lol!

    snowelf said...

    You should have told her that Crisco was bad for her hair and recommended some shampoo. :P