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    Thursday, July 31, 2008

    Thursday Portrait

    Ladies, have you ever had one of those days where you rethink your wardrobe, but it's too late because you are already on your way to work? Yesterday was one of those for me. I found a really cutastic (borrowed from Big Pissy) tank top really cheap. It fits me like a glove everywhere but the bust. Let's just say, I'm busting out of it, pun intended. Luckily, I had a hoodie that matched and I ended up wearing it in the 90 degree heat. Every man I came across wanted to know why I was dressed for winter. How could I explain that it was because the girls were hanging out?

    Anywho, here is a picture that doesn't really show the severity of my boob faux pas:

    I had the weirdest conversation with my step dad who is also my boss. He claims now to know everything about super morbidly obese people. *eye roll*. I let him know that he would never know what life was like until he had doors slammed in his face, was invisible and publicly ridiculed on a daily basis.

    I explained that I'm still the same person inside, just different outside, only now, people want to talk to me because I'm not crazy fat. He claims that I am different now. I guess I agree, but only because people treat me differently now and that makes life much easier and tends to change one's outlook.

    I was looking at pictures from a year ago and was startled to see how much I have changed physically.

    Here is a picture taken last year with G-Man, me and Barman on July 4th:

    Pretty crazy huh? I guess I really couldn't see the changes until I saw the difference, even since last year.


    barman said...

    So what is wrong with that work attire? LOL

    It is hard to see change when you are there day to day. But there certainly was a lot of change. At some point your face really made a huge change. I think you look awesome the way you are ... and then the next time I see you, you look even more incredible. I have a hard time saying that because I know that attempt at a compliment can be taken backwards but please don't go there because I certainly would never slam you for anything.

    You have changed some but in a great way. You have much more confidence in yourself. You carry yourself well. I think since people are treating you differently you are now able to shine through easier. But the basics that I love about you, what really make up you, is still there.

    Oh and someone that has never walked in the shoes of someone morbidly obese can be sympathetic but really does not know what it is like.

    Donna said...

    I think it's only natural that you change a little, as it is impossible not to change when the world treats you differently. I think the changes are healthy and subtle.

    I find that family notices and understands now that no matter how much they thought I was "okay" with the huge me, when they see me now, they understand how miserable and limited I felt.

    You'res still you. You are very grounded to begin with and have awesome support. I think that makes a difference in how you handle the world receiving the new you on the outside.

    You're a rock-stah gurl!

    Mona said...

    That is a cool dress & it looks good on you! Pink & blue suit you very well!

    My goodness! it is already one year since that picture? & I feel G man posted it just a few days ago!

    Hats off to you for having achieved what you have & you Deserve all the compliments that you get. I bet there are many more to come :)

    buddha_girl said...

    People who think they know what it's like to be obese can kiss my ass in Macy's window. Screw 'em.

    You know what? You HAVE changed. However, since WHEN do you have to explain or apologize for it? We're human - we're SUPPOSED to morph. People who don't change and grown are stangnant fucktards who have no place in my life.

    I'm sounding a bit vindictive today. *self-satisfied grin*

    cadbury_vw said...

    i suspect that you are different

    i think that seizing control over your body and your weight has had a cascading effect on your entire approach to the world

    you may have been invisible before both because of your weight and because you wanted to be...

    people might not have addressed you both because of the weight and because you signaled non-verbally that you didn't want to be approached


    with the above comments i do not want to invalid or dispute your experiences with prejudice because of your weight

    i am only trying to illustrate in a short comment that your attitude has changed and you way more ready to take on the world and be noticed

    you may be the same person you were inside, but how often did you let that person out? seriously - how often?

    Missy said...

    Jenn, just like most things we take on in life, it's a journey and these past few years for you, the journey has been continuous.

    I think in some ways we get scared to acknowledge our success for fear we will eventually will fail, but girl you've done such a good job of succeeding.

    Own that success and be proud. You look marvelous. Pink is a good color for you btw.

    Wonderful pic of you three. I think it is a wonderful thing that y'all have become such good friends, like family.

    Have a good day today kiddo. Will be by to see your flash tomorrow.

    The Savage said...

    Everyone should change... seriously... could you imagine wearing the exact same clothes all the time? Like, grody to the max....

    Or is it a different kind of change?

    morbidly obtuse said...

    Hi there! I ran across your blog, searching for WLS blogs. I have my RNY bypass on Sept. 16th. It was really nice to see a blog that's so upbeat! Most of the ones I've found are old, but I've found a BUNCH that are current too! You look amazing! I can't wait to join you on the smoking hot side, lmao!

    kimmyk said...

    nice cleavage!
    you look pretty in pink!

    i haven't looked at pictures in a long time. they freak me out..cause i dont know who that person is. or was. scary at times.

    lime said...

    you definitely have more confidence. you are the same person in that you love the same way, you value the same things and people. all your core values are the same, but i think even we who only get to interact with you in this limited way can see a new confidence which has blossomed. you've done so much. i'm proud of you and happy for you.

    ps...barman looks like he's copping a feel, hehehehe. sorry.

    snowelf said...

    I was going to ask if Barman and G-Man were grabbing your ass, but Lime beat me to it. ;) LOL

    Congratulations again Jenn. I know it feels like forever ago, and that when you started, you never imagined the success you would have, but you have come a long way, baby. I tend to hide inside myself in real life--often not feeling good enough about me to share my true self. (It's so much easier in blogger) It's only at the times that I'm feeling the most confident that I really let myself out. I know even at work, the guys I went to school with always tell me they didn't realize I was so fun and funny because I was always so shy in class. They were shocked when they "really" met me.

    And yea, with the weight on, people are judgemental assholes. I hate that about people, and I'm sorry you had to go through the invisibleness. It just sucks.

    I had to laugh about your work outfit, because I wore a hootchie mama dress to my work party on accident, and the whole night I was nervous about my co-workers seeing my girls too!! Yikes! :P

    Keep up the good work Jenn!! :)


    ciara said...

    you look fabulous in that pink! :) twins hanging or not LOL funny the prejudice, eh? it still amazes how people can automatically decide WHO we are by our looks.

    Jon said...

    I think the cleavage is TOTALLY appropriate. We live in America... it works {waving his flag high}

    jillie said...

    I sooooo love that color on you Jenn. You have the most beautiful sparkly blue eyes I have EVER seen!

    I am constantly amazed and stunned by all of your accomplishments. YOU ROCK!