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    Sunday, May 28, 2006

    And It Goes A Little Something Like This


    The doctors visit went as expected. I decided while my butt was hanging in the wind that the thin piece of paper under me wasn't really protecting me from those before me. To make matters worse, because I sweat when I'm nervous, the paper was stuck to my butt when the doctor asked me to stand up. I'm trying to pull the paper off me and stay covered up. Hard to do when the "gown" is open to the back. Then he wants me to bend over in front of him so he can look at the alignment of my shoulders and spine (he's an osteopath). Luckily I did have a paper drape to hold over my holy land. The nurse was standing behind me and says to me later, "I was noticing the back of your hair when I was standing behind you. How do you get it to do that?" I laughed really loud and said, "Thank God! I'm just glad you were looking at my hair and not my butt!"

    Dr. Googly Eyes was totally amazed at my blood work. He said that he could see 200 patients and none of them would have results as good as mine. He said that he has to admit that a fat person can be healthy.

    I was impressed with the weight loss surgery center since they had already sent their final report to my doctor which means that they have sent it to the insurance company. It took less than two days. The doctor had to get one last final dig in by reading part of the report to me and adding his own words. When he got to the part where the doctor had described my abdomen (good bowel sounds & soft) he said, "Abdomen, abundant." I said, "Thanks for telling me that. It really made me feel much better about myself." I can't wait until I don't have anything for him to comment about. I highly doubt that he makes rude remarks about women who aren't overweight.

    This doctor is well respected in the community. He is the Chief of Staff at one of the local hospitals. He's also 78 years old. He loves Mr. Sign and my kids. I only stick with him because he really is good at what he does. I decided he doesn't like me because I have some medical knowledge (I was going to be a doctor in my previous life) and have diagnosed Mr. Sign and my kids before he has. He seems to be misogynistic and can't seem to believe that a mother would know what's wrong with her children.

    I'm excited because all of my info is now being considered at the insurance company. I should know soon whether or not I will be having gastric bypass surgery.

    I had to work yesterday (Saturday) because we are so busy at work. Today we are planting all the annuals and the garden. It's hotter than Hades here. It's supposed to be 90 and humid. I hope I live through it.

    11 comments:

    Manny said...

    It is going to soooo work out for you.

    Doctors. gheeeez. Oh well, he sounds like he's the best.

    DZER said...

    I'm glad I don't have to worry about that procedure ...

    ... shit ... need a prostrate screening soon though ... LOL

    have fun planting! :)

    barman said...

    I hope you got your flowers planted.

    What a goofy doctor. Mine has been OK so far. I would hate to have to put up with comments like that. Good luck with the insurance company and please do continue to keep us posted.

    By the way, that gown hits closer to home than I would like to admit. I was in emergency several times in the last few years and also had a lot of tests done before they determined I had gall bladder problems. Those gowns are just plain wrong. Let's see the Doctors wear them too!

    Suze said...

    Jenn, it's looking good. Are you planning on keeping a pictoral diary as you progress through your weight loss? It will inspire you and others who are maybe considering this kind of surgery.

    BTW, can you please send over some Summer weather, it's shitty over here.

    Have a great weekend sweetie.

    cutie said...

    Egads, Gurl...you're right, it was hot as hell here yesterday and I worked my ass off(I wish) in the garden and still didn't get it all done. Just got too damn hot.

    It sucks when it goes from frost to rainforest to desert in the span of two weeks.

    Ahhhhh....Michigan, my Michigan.

    Manny said...

    I am here. Can you escape the heat. Blow hubby a kiss and run inside for a sec. Or you could try what i use to do. Whenver Chad and I would be working outside I would go in, knock at the window and flash him my boobs. That made him want to get finished quick and he would let me stay inside. ha ha

    Big Pissy said...

    Just think: it's this hot and it's only May!

    What's August gonna be like?!?!? :(

    Chrissie said...

    bleh... I was supposed to go in April :o/ At least my Dr is good looking and in my age range! *L* He can be an ass though... hes allowed.. hes also become one of my best friends the last 8 years.

    Spinning Girl said...

    oh the indignity!

    American Navel said...

    that doctor is a real douche.

    American Navel said...

    and not the good kind of douche, neither.