This And That

• We are supposed to get 8 inches of snow by tomorrow. I'm looking at the positive that I will build some arm muscles from all that shoveling.

• The closer I get to going to Vegas, the more excited I am. I plan on living life to the fullest. Hopefully you won't read about me in the papers. On second thought...

• Thanksgiving was a little strange. I feel like I don't fit in with my family anymore. They treat me so differently, but I guess I act differently. How can they know who I am, if I don't even know.

• I'm trying to kill the fat girl in my head, but she just won't die.

• People who didn't know me when I was fat don't believe that I used to weigh 384 pounds. Even after showing them pictures, they still argue that it can't be me in the pictures.

• It's really hard to wrap my head around the fact that I look like I do. I spent 38 years looking different and it's hard to accept my own appearance.
  

• I have hardly eaten for the last 4 days. I have no idea why I have no appetite. It's quite a switch from the last 6 months that I've been ravenous. The only thing I can think of is that I haven't exercised since Wednesday. I'm feeling sloth like and not needing calories.

• I have been bestowed with several early gifts this week (anniversary, early birthday and Christmas). I got a GPS and a new camera.
  

A picture with the new camera:

Hope everyone had a great holiday and got all of their Christmas shopping done!

Bullets Galore!

I've decided that using bullets is the laziest easiest way to blog for me right now. I'm not sure I'm able to make complete sentences, so bear with me.

• The upcoming holidays are making me ambivalent for more than one reason. I wish I didn't have to put up decorations because I'm a Grinch at heart right now.

• December is normally my favorite month of the year, but not this year. First we have our 19th wedding anniversary, my 40th birthday in Vegas, Christmas and finally New Years Eve. All of these festivities are leaving me feeling cold.

• Every day I am reminded of how much I have to be thankful for. My girls amaze me every day with one thing or another. They are healthy, articulate, brilliant, beautiful, talented, loving etc. I could go on for days...

• Both of my maternal grandparents are still alive and living on their own. I don't want to think about life without them.

• My love for my electric blanket is bordering on insanity. I want to go to bed at 6 PM every night.

• Do any of you read my Twitter updates at the top of this blog? I ♥ Twitter.
  

• The fitness magazine has contacted me and now I'm having a hard time deciding which pictures to use. They have offered to take a new after shot, but I dread the idea of not having control over the picture. I am so critical of myself that way.

• Most of you have no idea how much my life is really sucking right now. It's ok to be confused, because I sure am.

• Could these bullets be more bi polar?
  

• I have become one of the best music CD makers ever! My kids love me for that.
  

• Thinking of quitting my day job to become a go go dancer (as long as I can keep my clothes on. Ahaha!!

• People never cease to amaze me. I thoroughly enjoy watching their faces as they figure out that I'm not as dumb as I appear although I admit to using that to my advantage when playing Poker.

• Dancing in my car makes me laugh, especially when other drivers are watching.
  

That is all for now. Toodles!

More Bullets

• I was getting my free pair of Victoria's Secret underwear, when a woman told me that she hated the style of underwear I was getting. She said that I liked them because I was "older". Grrr...

• A friend made me laugh so hard yesterday that I almost wet my pants.

• I love laughing so hard that you have tears streaming down your face.

• Why do I always have to work outside when it's freezing?

• The holidays are making me ambivalent.

• My electric blanket is all I think about all day long.
  

• Walking in 29 F weather yesterday felt invigorating.

• Raspberry flavoring is one of my favorites, however I can't stand real raspberries because of the seeds.

• I am completely addicted to Face Book.

• Driving on black ice yesterday made me remember who is in control and it was not me.

• I am a very spiritual person, however I have no use for religion.

• My life is moving at the speed of light and yet I feel like I'm standing still sometimes.

Bullets

• I bought a size 10 pair of jeans a few weeks back. Granted, these are very generous size 10's but the tag says 10! My largest jean size was a 36W. In case you are keeping track, that's 13 sizes and 26 inches. Whew!

• The fitness magazine still hasn't called me for an interview. I'm a little bummed that it might not happen.

• My 40th birthday is next month.

• Mr. Sign planned a trip to Las Vegas with my two best friends and my sister and her husband. His 40th is the day after mine so we will celebrate together at midnight.

• A few months ago, I was looking forward to 40, but now I'm feeling old.

• A guy, who must have been really drunk, told me that he thought I was 25.

• I played poker this weekend and beat the pants off of 6 men. I love that they assume I'm an idiot because I'm blonde. Hehe!

• It snowed here this weekend and I'm not sure how I feel about that. Normally I love the snow, but I'm hating the cold that comes with it.

• My weight seems to be pretty stable right now. I'd love to lose another 15 pounds but I'm not sure what drastic measures I would have to take to do it.
  

• One of my best friends hadn't seen me in a while and tried to convince me not to lose any more weight. It's hard for people who are used to seeing you heavy. I am by no means as small as I need to be.

• The girls went deer hunting this weekend and neither of them got one. #1 did get a shot off, but the deer was out of range.
  

I've Got Nothing

Not a whole lot has been going on in my world lately. Work has been a little slow. All of my projects have been put on hold.

I used to have no problem staying home doing nothing. I spent 10 years raising the girls, working only when Mr. Sign wasn't, so that we didn't have to put them in daycare. I worked cleaning houses, sometimes up to 12 per week. There always seemed to be something to do then.

Now, if I'm home, I feel useless. Maybe it's because I don't weigh close to 400 pounds, but now my house is easier to keep up and my laundry is always done. I hadn't really thought about how much easier my life is physically since losing weight. I used to have to plan my day around staying in the basement to do the laundry because I couldn't run up and down the stairs. How pathetic is that?

I have been able to work out a lot lately. I'm still exercising at Curves and walking between 4 and 6 miles a day. Walking in the evening has allowed me much time to get my thoughts together. I am addicted.

So, today I'm going to work on my tan and my freakishly blonde hair. The sun is zapping all the color from it.



Have a great day!!

OCD or Obsessions?

I have some major issues with things. I'm going to list them here:

• Money must be put in my wallet (or pocket) facing the same direction with the denominations going from smallest to largest. I can't handle backward upside down money all willy nilly in my presence.

• The transfer tape at work must be arranged in order of size from smallest to largest.

• The vinyl must be organized by color families at work.

• Clothes must all hang on hangers facing the same direction (left) arranged by color and sleeve length.

• Folded clothes must also be folded in the same direction.
  

• The toilet seat must always be down. I don't care if the lid isn't closed. I'm not a total freak.

• I have to eat cheese popcorn with a spoon so that my fingers don't turn orange.

• White clothes must always have bleach added to the laundry.

• I weigh myself at least 4 times a day.
  

• The first thing I have to do when I come home is wash my hands and I use anti bacterial gel in my car after every place I go. I can't handle the thought of other peoples' germs crawling around on me. My germs are ok though.

• I touch nothing with my hands in bathrooms. I open doors and turn off the water using paper towels and flush with my foot.
  

• Documenting what I eat has become an obsession.

These are just a few that I can think of. Do you have any "crazy" things that make you insane?

New Notes From The Noggin

• Just when you feel sorry for yourself, you find out someone you know was dead for 2 days before anyone found him.

• Once you are gone, nothing else in this world that you tried to do matters, except your kids.
  

• A friend trying to hold back tears will always make me sob.

• I've made peace with my ass. I kind of like the way it's looking (at least in jeans).

• The Oscars bored me beyond belief.

• I have a crush on Mike Rowe from Dirty Jobs.

• I've had some strange pets including a racoon, 9.5 foot boa constrictor and a white rat.

• Why do I still miss my grandma who has been gone for 8 years?

• Every day I wonder what concequences my body will endure because of weight loss surgery.

• Why did I only lose 8 pounds total last month?

• Bras do not fit me correctly no matter how much they cost.

• I need to laugh today.

• I look pretty good with a mohawk.

Notes From The Noggin

♣ I really missed eating Packzi this year. *S*, it's a Polish donut like pastry filled with fruit made for pre Lent. The idea behind making them was to get rid of all the fruit and lard before Lent.

♣ I have way too much work to do at work. The boss is out of town until next week.

♣ I'm so glad that WMY is back. She makes me snort!

♣ I miss Nonny. Please come back and entertain us with your Sith-like ways.

♣ I really hate American Idol this season.

♣ I've logged way too many hours on my laptop lately.

♣ Sawyer from Lost is someone who could make me forget I'm married.

♣ I have formed many great friendships with fellow weight loss surgery patients as of late.

♣ Most people have no idea how to address someone who has lost weight without being derogatory.

♣ I need to get rid of the rest of my big clothes. Nothing fits anymore.

♣ I can't find a bra that fits and supports that doesn't cost too much.

♣ Yesterday was a really slow comment day for me. Must be you don't like meme's.

♣ I'm thinking of taking some graphic design classes.

♣ My high school classmates want me to arrange our 20 year reunion this year. I told them I'm too busy blogging.

♣ The snow is melting quickly.

♣ Top web searches that bring people here: quick weight loss, Boones Farm wine, Love-O-Matic, big boobs, weightloss surgery pics, willpower, and U.S. official.

♣ I think I'm feeling a template change coming on. Oh dear Lord, please help me!

♣ Blogging is on my mind way more than I care to admit (except to you guys).